Welcome to Motivational Mondays, your weekly PEP (Proactive, Empowered, Performance) talks with Mark Kent.
How has your week been? Have you been able to see the relationship between thoughts, emotions and behaviours? Were you able to associate aspects of the Procrastinators Code to any personal habits that may affect your performance and motivation?
Have you been able to break or at least bend the code by challenging habitual thoughts, and behaviours that will help you improve conscious control over your emotions and ability to complete tasks?
This week I will attempt to complete breaking the Procrastinators Code (continued from last week http://superstresssolutions.com/motivationalmondays/index.html)
#5) OTHER PEOPLE'S OPINIONS OF ME MATTER AND WHAT THEY WANT TAKES PRECEDENCE OVER MY OWN CONCERNS.
This thought is based upon unconscious needs for approval and acceptance. Although it is normal to for most people to be concerned about what others think, when you defer your own responsibilities and goals it's easy to see how you could self-sabotage.
When you have a diminished sense of self worth and purpose it will always be difficult to exert your will upon the environment and maintain your course of action regardless of what other think or want from you.
If you are constantly reacting to others and their expectation it will be virtually impossible to strive forward and maintain your objectives without compromising for others.
It is the ability to balance your responsibility toward others while maintaining control for yourself that brings us into balance and personal empowerment. Ultimately it's your opinion of yourself and making your tasks a priority that will improve your sense of mastery and overall productivity in life.
#6) I MUST TAKE TOTAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR OTHER PEOPLE'S REACTION TO ME.
This code can be responsible for inducing guilt and compensatory behaviours that can sabotage your emotional wellbeing and intentions to complete tasks.
Ever notice how easy it is to stay task focused when you feel positive about yourself and in control of your interests?
Taking responsibility for other people's emotions and actions is de-centering your energy as you have little if any control upon how others react to you. The more you focus your intentions and energies upon what matters to you, then it will be easier to maintain emotional economy and harness your energies towards self efficacy. (Capacity to complete tasks you set out to do)
#7) I AM CONTROLLED BY MY PAST, WHICH I CANNOT CHANGE THEREFORE I CAN EXPECT IT TO BE REPEATED OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
Breaking this code is probably the most difficult because we are all creatures of habits, which are formed, in our formative years.
Although we are shaped by our experiences we also have the opportunity to learn from them and alter self-defeating patterns. This is not easy but with due diligence and hard work it's possible to change self destructive patterns towards future empowerment and greater productivity in life by recognizing every day provides an opportunity to learn and adjust habitual behaviours.
The secret is to see personal characteristics as dynamic and malleable as opposed to fixed characteristics. Most habits are learned from our past therefore can be modified and relearned to reshape future change.
#8) ANY CHANGES I TRY TO MAKE SHOULD HAPPEN IMMEDIATELY AND ANY SETBACKS MEANS I AM A FAILURE AND SOMEHOW FLAWED.
It's easy to see how this code can sabotage any efforts to change and improve your life. When most people endeavour to make major changes in their habits it’s usually due to desperation or inspiration with little forethought to methodical application.
The thought that just because it seems the right thing to do, therefore should happen as expected is faulty thinking and doomed to discouragement and frustration.
The emotional brain (see motivational Mondays archives) does not give up its turf easily so it's healthy to expect some relapses towards change as a normal part of growth.
It's vital to realize long-term change is a series of smaller corrections; sometimes two steps back for each one forward. Realize that to break the Procrastinators Code you will occasionally slip back into old habits, however continuing persevere and strive towards improvement while being patient along the way will allow for successful improvements in overcoming self defeating behaviours.
Your challenge is to consistently be mindful of cracking the code as the learning curve is accentuated by repetitions.
Next week I will discuss how to overcome self-sabotaging thoughts, which will help you to improve productivity and motivation.
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Thanks for the opportunity to serve you.
To your productivity, empowerment and motivation.
Mark
